There’s no average day in the life of….

Do you have an average day? I don’t. They’re all a bit different. Often evolving as they progress, rarely planned anything more than by a vague outline, and quite often a little ‘out of the norm’ . Saying I’m not a nine to fiver is a bit of an understatement.

Want to know what my day is doing? Well it’s now 11am and I’m here..

Yep. I’m working whilst in the bath!

So today is like this. I woke up at 8:30 and though ‘i fancy a bath’ so I popped off to the bathroom but there was a spider in the bath and I didn’t want to disturb him so I hopped back into bed. Hubby, as is his wonderful habit, appeared with a cup of tea and we sat in bed catching up on FB and Twitter and discussed our separate ‘plans’ for the day.

We have b&b guests this coming weekend so for me it was ironing bedding. I see ironing as a bit of a waste of time so whilst steaming away I practiced a belly dance routine (and I haven’t even told you before that I go to dance classes.. another day another blog); and did some toe exercises as prescribed by Katie Holland as ‘guaranteed to improve your dancing’… Katie, I’m doubtful that anything will help but I’ll let you know.

Having built up a steam iron sweat I’m now in the bath (fortunately Bernard the Bath  Spider had buggered off) but to make better use of the time I’m both writing this for you lot and sorting out my art catalogue, making sure all my work to date is listed and titled. I have an exhibition pending and I need to make sure I know what’s  where and ensure I have enough pieces in the collection. Plus I’m having half a dozen or so images printed up as cards and my photographer friend and technical whizz needs to have the wording for the backs covers.

Alongside getting this done….

and I’ve added a face pack…may as well spruce up properly.

It’s now noon. Too late for breakfast, so a quick brunch and then off to get some groceries.

Marmite and mushrooms on toast yumyum

May as well pack up my old bras and take them to the bra bank at Tescos whilst I’m at it.

Donating my old bras

It’s a gorgeous day so hoping to get back in time to garden at home. Still have several plants that need to go in the ground before winter sets in.

….it’s now evening. Needless to say the gardening didn’t happen. I had about £60 in my hand from a swishing event I organised at the last-minute to clear out my wardrobe. A swish, for those who don’t know (I didn’t when invited to one last year), is a clothes swap. I’d cleared out my cupboards and had a car boot full of clothes and shoes to get rid of , friends could have them for a donation to a local charity. It raised £58 and I still managed to drop 2 large sacks of goodies at the local community charity shop.

So having done my shopping I went back into Aldi and spent the £58 with a view to dropping it at the local food bank. Sadly the charity was closed so that will involve another trip but look how much I got for my money!!!! Six full bags of none perishables! Aldi really is better value

Just about to head into the garden when I remember we have a fridge freezer to pick up from a friend (I need extra storage for the catering for my 50th).

And then the doorbell rings. The landlords of the flats I manage are here from Spain and I forgot they were popping in. Still they came armed with plenty of wine so I’m not complaining.

By which time it’s supper time. I cook a meal for me and Hubby. Bulk cook a bolognaise to add to the new freezer. Watch a movie. Then suddenly it’s midnight so off to bed.

Guess who’s back?

Bernard the Bath Spider

I wonder how he filled his day?

Lucy At Home

My Random Musings

…After the crash..

So yesterday I literally did nothing. I managed to get up and feed my B&B guests complete with smiling and chatting . Then I went back to bed. I slept until nearly 2pm… Despite Hubby trying to wake me at noon. I stayed awake long enough to reheat a cup of tea in the microwave. Sat on the front doorstep in the sun and fell asleep. Woke briefly when Hubby popped home. Long enough to get a pillow and a deck chair. Then slept in the sun.

Stayed awake to eat supper, fell asleep in front of TV. Had an early night and slept right through.

This was me crashing… I refer to my blog from yesterday … Oh yes I did find a moment or two to articulate my crash in blog form.. but that really was the extent of yesterday’s activities.

So today I am already three gardening jobs behind, racked with guilt and stressed by my backlog.

I sat down this evening, knackered and aching from head to toe. As I berated myself for my pathetic state I announced to myself “for Christ’s sake woman you only did 3 hours work today, get a grip”…. Long pause as I’m now lying in bed. This was my day:

Woke 7:30. Got up and prepped breakfast for our 6 B&B guests

Placed an order with our stained glass suppliers

Did 3 hours heavy digging and weed clearing.

Drove the 20 miles to our nearest  supermarket. Did the weekly shop

Collected our son

Unpacked shopping

Spent an hour tidying in my own garden

Had a bath

Cleaned the bathroom

Made a roast dinner…

… So to be fair, considering my physical and mental state… In fact, irrespective of my physical and mental state, today was pretty full.

..And now I can add, ‘wrote a blog’, to my achievements for today.

On that note, I am going to turn of the light and zzzzzzzzzzzz

Its a perfect day, if only I had the energy…

20160508_153945[1]
…and rest
I’m writing this with one eye shut, hiding under a blanket in shame, hoping you won’t notice me. An irrational thread of worry that you will find me pathetic. A big dollop of feeling like a fraud.

I have this battle going on in my head ( imagine that image in movies with the saint and the devil on each shoulder whispering conflicting messages into your ears).

I’m knackered. Totally and utterly drained of energy. My head is trying to formulate action my body is in total all out protest fight.  I am not functioning.

Over the last week my body has ached more and more. My brain has fought against my body harder and harder. Today my body is on strike, a barrier has been built between my mind and muscles and my head hurts from bashing itself against it.

I’ve turned to mush. I managed to get up and serve my guests breakfast with all the energy, smiling and chatting that goes with that.  I had some breakfast and argued with my body to prepare for action. It’s the most glorious day. I have 5 outstanding gardening jobs to do. I’d rescheduled 2 for today and 3 for tomorrow.

The only thing my body would do was lay down. The only thing my mind would do was switch off. I lost my gorgeous sunny morning to sleep. Asked hubby to wake me around noon… It was an impossible task. I dragged myself downstairs at two. Microwaved the cup of tea he’d brought me two hours earlier.  I sat on the front door step hoping the gorgeous day would energise me…. I fell asleep with my head against the door frame.

I’m not ill. I shouldn’t be exhausted. Yes, I do a lot but I don’t really put in full days like I did when working for the man. I love my life and the closet of hats it comes with.

I do see a pattern. Note my post “life: mine:it’s full: .. Shortly after I get to the euphoric with life point;  the feeling of reaching a perfect balance. Shortly after exalting the joy and contentment I feel to my world, I run out of fuel and fall into decline.

Writing my last blog ( “life, mine..”) it was after our quiet season and into the growth and rebirth of the next. Spring had sprung. Guests were booking into our B&B; gardens needed tending; buds were forming on the trees and bushes; all those tender fluorescent green shoots dancing in warm breezes . Snowdrops, crocuses and daffodils; Camellia, forsythia and grape hyacinths splashed colour onto life’s canvas and everything, including me, felt so alive and vital.  And then there was overload.

The week that included Easter was beyond busy. So many hats to wear at the same time. They were too heavy. “But hey,” thought I, “Get through the week and then rest”. But the next week was even busier….. “I can do this”, I thought. Most of the demands were things I love to do: glass, cafe, guests, gardening. However there were what felt like a zillion other little things that needed to be done too. Tiny jobs: organise an electrician; message tenants; collect my new glasses; shop for food; make veggie sausages; meet up with friends; buy a birthday gift.

My body started to protest. Everything ached. Then it ached more. My brain failed to send messages to the right parts of my body. It took 40 minutes mid-week to persuade my body to get off a chair and walk back to the car to drive home. At the traffic lights I had to battle with my eyes not to close and just have a little cat nap.

Today I’ve just slept. I’m sure I feel worse for it. Not only are guilt and shame raging through me. Also totally embarrassment and a sense of patheticness. Then panic. I have so much to do. The weather is perfect to do it. I would really enjoy doing it too.  The customers would be so happy too, I love visiting these elderly ladies and chatting whilst gardening. But I’ve done nothing. Not even told the customers… I know this makes it worse but I just can’t, I’m just not there. The party I should be at tonight, I just can’t go. I know I can’t persuade my body to put on clothes and go out, it just will not cooperate. Hubby will have to phone, I’m too ashamed.

I’m going to stop now before i go on about how much stronger, stable, capable everyone i know is; how much more everyone I admire does etc etc… I know its a short phase rest will resolve.  So, despite my guilt I’m going to search out a sun lounger and go and snooze in the garden.  Will battle the guilt later xxx